It is the 6^th year now that I have been decorating with my husband John for Christmas. Well, he is decorating and I only have veto rights. He looooves Christmas and is always so excited when we get the decorations out on 1^st December. The more things and the more colours the better. That is John’s approach. I would prefer a simple green and red colour scheme. It is hard to find a compromise between these two.

Christmas Market Feeling in the Living Room

The first Christmas that we spent in the new house I banned the flashy 70’s festoon that we used to put up in John’s old apartment. To me that wasn’t Christmassy at all. But still, our Christmas decorations are far from being subtle. When we switch on all the lights in the living room it shines as bright as a German Christmas market. Anyway, apart from a few tacky little elements our house is like a wonderful cottage Christmas dream.

Principles…

I insist on a real Christmas tree every year. I love the smell of it because it reminds me of Christmas in my childhood. John can’t live without the Christmas tree hangers he has been collecting since he was a kid. Some of them still contain the original sweets that are older than me by now. It has become our tradition that we buy a new item for the tree together every year.

…and Compromises

Instead of delicate Christmas balls following a certain colour scheme, our tree is a collection of things that have personal value to either or both of us. At the bottom we put unbreakable stuff that our 2-year old can take off and play with. The hangers with the 40-years old sweets go to the very top so that no one gets food poisoning.

The Apple doesn’t fall far from the Tree

So neither of us is getting their way. John had to say goodbye to his tinsel and I will never see my green and red colour scheme. I guess that is what marriage is about. We tend to do it differently with the Christmas gifts though. Hopefully everybody is getting what they want in this case.

That said it gave me a huge satisfaction to hear that originally Christmas trees started off with just red apples hanging on them. The homily in the church on 3^rd of Advent was all about where the custom of the Christmas tree comes from. When no one could read or write bible stories were told through little performances. On Christmas Eve a play used to show the story of Adam & Eve. Therefore they needed a tree that was still green in winter. And it is well known that apples played a vital role in it too. So I was intrinsically right about my colour scheme and that is all I needed to know.

So where does the Blood on the Wreath come from?

Anyway, it didn’t cause an argument between John and me. So where does the blood on the wreath come from when not from a fight over the Christmas decorations? The wreaths that are put up on the lovely Irish front doors in Advent also have a deeper (Christian) meaning. They originate from the little crown of leaves that the Antique Romans wore on their heads when they came home victorious. After Jesus’ crucifixion his followers put it outside their doors as sign of victory over death. No crucifixion without blood. This was symbolised by red berries stuck on the wreath which we now know as the classic Advent wreath. Nowadays often replaced by red ribbons or balls. More common is the symbolism of everlasting life represented by its circular shape and the always green pine leaves.

Exciting News

I have been going to mass with my husband on a Sunday for quite a while now. Hence I have gone through the liturgy a few times. I still learn something new every week. However this time I felt a bit like a child in school who couldn’t wait to get home to share what they have learned. It was just a refreshing piece of information and in contrast to the contents from the weekly readings I didn’t have to follow up on it in our son’s children’s bible.

With these ‘enlightening’ news I want to wish you all a Happy Christmas and a Happy New Year! Now that you have finished reading this blog post, try to put your phone to the side for a while. This is exactly what I am going to do. I am looking forward to a few enjoyable days with my family.

When I was a child I didn’t want to be anywhere for Christmas but home. I insisted that we celebrated Christmas exactly the same every year. Just the family. At home. No visitors. When we left the house it was only for our traditional Christmas walk through the winter wonderland. Well, there wasn’t always snow, but most of the time it was cold and crisp which was acceptable for me too.

The good old Tradition

Only as an adult do I now realise how important tradition was to me and obviously always has been, especially around Christmas time. I loved the same Christmas decorations every year, nothing new and fancy. Everything had its place. The colourful aluminium tree, that made a metallic jingle once the candles were put in motion on the kitchen table. The tree top reserved for a glittery angel with short white hair, who I therefore named after an old aunt of the family. My favourite Christmas balls had lost a bit of their colour already, but I always sneaked into the tree. Replacements were about as welcome as spontaneous visitors interrupting the “family peace”.

I don’t like Change

Over the years the way we celebrated Christmas changed. Sometimes they were big, unwanted changes, such as the first Christmas without granddad. Other years they were only small, practical adjustments like putting the tree up in a different place. When granny died, the tradition of Christmas-cookie-making ended. Anyway, I tried to hold on to as many family rituals as I could.

A Matter of Perspective

I took over making the advent calendar out of empty toilet paper rolls, that my granny used to put up for us on the staircase in the hallway. I asked my parents to move the Christmas tree back to the corner in the living room where it had always been before. I insisted on watching Russian fairy tales while decorating the Christmas tree, since my sister and I used to love them when we were kids. But Christmas wasn’t the same anymore. I thought it was due to the fact that my beloved jingly tree had eventually met its maker.

Whatever I did to keep our family Christmas traditions alive, nothing brought back the feeling of excitement and joy that I used to have as a child awaiting Christmas Eve. I just wasn’t able to see it all through the eyes of a child anymore. Guess what, I wasn’t a child anymore. However, all the “magical things” that seemed to have happened for me during Advent had now been replaced by a rather sober view of a grown-up.

New Traditions

Two years ago I ended the tradition of spending Christmas in my parents’ house. Not because I didn’t want to be with my family anymore, but because I now had a family of my own. I realised that I can bring back the magic of Christmas by looking into my son’s eyes rather than trying to revive reams of Christmas rituals of my own childhood. So I learned to see Christmas from a different angle again – not with children’s eyes but in them.

One for you one for me

This year is going to be the third Christmas away from “home”. We are on our way to establish our own family traditions. (I am still looking for a jingly tree like the one we had, but I have also found new ‘favourite’ decorations in the meantime.) The first year we had to decide what we are going to do the German way and what the Irish one. I introduced the empty-toilette-roll-advent-calendar. My husband made me familiar with the stockings on the fireplace. I had to adapt to doing presents on the morning of the 25^th instead of 24^th at night time. On the other hand, I gladly accepted putting up the Christmas tree on the 1^st December and not just on Christmas Eve. On Christmas Eve we are now going to the evening mass which my grandparents used to bring us to in Germany before I even knew what this was all about. Thus old and new, German and Irish traditions come full circle.

The Christmas Magic is back

The magic of Christmas now means for me to spend a very special time with my family. It means to reflect on old traditions and memories, but also to make new ones. Having said that, I wish everybody and especially my family in Germany and Ireland a Merry Christmas with lots of memorable moments!

P.S. If you have lost the ability of seeing the magic of Christmas as a grown-up as well, I would like to recommend you watching the movie “The Polar Express”. My sister gave it to me years ago and I know now why.